The Cannibal Wars of Old Foulnest Part 6: Eight Pounds of Flesh


Damnation, ruination and starvation: a threefold death-grip on Old Foulnest, and a time of testing for the truly faithful. The Middenmans welcomed the bitter hardship: their creed dictates that the greater the suffering in life, the greater the reward after death. The Miscreants were likewise exultant: never had circumstances been more favourable to make sacrifice to the Lord of Skin and Sinew.

Suffering and sacrifice were enjoyed in abundance when the two gangs met in Foulnest core, screaming their opposed litanies of hatred and bloodshed.

The Middenmans had laid a crude ambush for the Eschers, who were few in number after recent losses. Torment-Unending-For-The-Unworthy made his followers – particularly those who were close to madness from starvation – spread out, intending to encircle the Miscreants. Realising they they were outnumbered, Beretta, the sly leader of the Eschers, saw fit to misdirect the Cawdors, sending the fresh juve Noob and khimerix Fuckfuckfuck on a decoy run down one flank while she and the other four members of the gang made ready to carve their way though their foes on the opposite side, dodging through a maze of containers.

Torment did his best to direct his followers accordingly, but Salvation-Shall-Verily-Be-Paid-For-In-Blood, Scourge-Thyself-For-Thine-Sins and Shriven-Are-The-Rancorous found themselves were laid low by Stone Cold's hand flamer. Salvation was scorched out of action, the green-tinted fire cooking his flesh but the others rolled the flames off, and Shriven charged Stone Cold and took her down.

Meanwhile, Inexorable-Is-His-Judgement cackled with glee as he hunted down the hapless Noob, but failed to realise he was being hunted himself. Fuckfuckfuck pounced, and Inexorable was badly mauled by the khimerix's razor claws. Unstinting-Is-His-Vengeance rushed to avenge his fallen brother, and tore at the gene-brewed felid's flesh with his chainglaive, but the cat struck back, and Unstinting was out of the fight.

Middenman reinforcements flushed Beretta's crew out of their refuge: with Terror-Bringeth-Deliverance and Pity-Not-The-Recidivist respectively bringing hand-flamer and incendiary bombs to sow havoc among the Eschers. The Miscreants fought back and advanced: Beretta dodged Scourge's longrifle shots and took him down with her plasma gun, Juanita took her blade to Terror, and arch-malcontent Sui Ti Py brought up the rear, singing the praises of the Butcher Lord.

Down the corridor, Fuckfuckfuck claimed another victim as Redeemed-Are-The-Abased's polearms proved too short to keep the khimerix at bay. But the ganger's sacrifice bought Torment enough time to advance and level his flamer at the beast. Engulfed in flames, Fuckfuckfuck flailed away down the tunnels and out of the fight.

Shriven-Are-The-Rancorous's burgeoning career as a lethal juve was cut brutally short as Beretta knifed him savagely before darting out of the battlezone. By now, both gangs were at their nerves' end, ready to flee. Torment realised that his crew were sustaining heavy losses and hardly carving off enough meat to make it worthwhile. He ordered the Middenmans' retreat. Only Pity-Not-The-Recidivist lingered on, hunting for Noob in the darkness- but he searched in vain, and the skirmish was over.

Back at the Middenkirk, the Cawdors took stock. Redeemed was absent – it turned out he had been captured by the Miscreants, and would have to be rescued before his blood was spilled in the name of the Lord of Skin and Sinew. For Shriven, Inexorable and Torment, there was nothing to be done: the sawbones's fee was more meant than the gang had to feed itself. And so Torment decreed that Shriven and Inexorable be butchered and added to the gang's larder, while Torment, whose wound was festering most disturbingly, would simply be immolated to ashes.

But the lamentations were perfunctory, and each Cawdor cove – including those three doomed wretches – was glad in his heart, for the greater the suffering in life, the greater the reward after death. What suffering could be greater than this?

The Middenmans would find out soon enough, as the Cannibal Wars drove Foulnest deeper into darkness.